What makes a strong woman?

What makes a strong woman? The kind of woman who lives by principle, who is unfazed by weak morals of those around her. One who does not succumb and give in and thereby give up what the Almighty expects of her (and what does the Almighty expect of her? This, I’ll discuss later.)

The kind of woman who does not need validation of her worth from anyone, least of all strangers, least of all creepy, strange men lurking on the internet. Strangers who, by the way, are most unworthy of her time, attention, words, and… her – are most unworthy to look at her.

How does one become her? How does one raise her?

I find myself coming back to these thoughts often. My thoughts conclude to this āyah,

O sister of Aaron, your father was not a man of evil, nor was your mother unchaste. – Maryam:28

This is what was said to Maryam ʿalayhas salām when she returned from her time in seclusion clutching an infant.

It is as if they knew that one who grows up in a stronghold such as the one Maryam grew up in will least likely deviate and become corrupt and unchaste.

What strikes me is the ratio of men to wom(a)n mentioned in the āyah.

It’s often said that the fate of our future generations rests upon the shoulders of the women today. If we want an ummah that’s good enough, women better raise good enough children.

But here in the āyah we’ve got a different formula to raising a strong woman – the kind I described earlier. She needs twice the number of righteous men around her than women. Ah.

Or… perhaps this: one woman, a mother, who’s capable, is enough for the daughter to grow up and become an upright woman.

Backtrack to sūrah Āle-ʿImrān and this point is reiterated by a conversation Wife of ʿImrān, Maryam’s mother, had with her Lord.

If you were to look at that conversation, you’ll realise something peculiar, she says, ❝and *I* have named her Maryam…❞, considering the era they lived in, how often do you think a woman got enough freedom to name her child? But she did.

You see, a stronghold isn’t formed overnight by the efforts of one. It needs dedication, effort, sincerity, and the right people to bring it about.